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NaNoWriMo 2016, Update #5

by Kellyn Roth |
November 28, 2016

Guess what?

Winner

That’s right! I currently have 53,462 words. However, I made my goal (50,000) on the 25th. How many more words do I expect to get before November’s up? Well, at most I expect to reach 60,000 … but even that would be a stretch.
I think I have that much material story-wise … but I might not finish At Her Fingertips this month. I might write ‘The End’ sometime in the first week of December. But, in my opinion, that’s a worse-case scenario. 😉
 

Now, before I go (short post, I know, but I want to get back to writing!), your excerpt and quote, m’lady (or … sir):


An excerpt from Chapter Twenty-One of At Her Fingertips

Alice waltzed in Gibson’s arms and tried not to think about Peter – Mr. Strauss – and what he’d said to her.

You could never be stupid. When Gibson complimented her (which was getting more and more often now), he complimented the way she looked. Not that she would have protested if what he said was true, but it wasn’t. She didn’t like his lying. If he couldn’t compliment her truthfully, he’d best not compliment her at all.

But Peter … Mr. Strauss … had worked his way around her defects of face and form and complimented her truthfully – or at least he thought it was truthful; she could see in his eyes that he definitely thought what he said was true. That was nice of him. If she forgot his name and face some day, she’d remember that.

“You seem distracted tonight,” Gibson whispered, too close to her ear.

Alice drew back slightly. “I’m sorry. What were you saying?”

“You’re beautiful.”

Alice stared up at him for a minute. “I’m not beautiful,” she said.

“Women always say that,” he scoffed.

“But I mean it. I know I’m not beautiful. Please admit it.”

Gibson stared at for a minute, perhaps saw sincerity in her eyes, and smiled. “All right. I admit it. You’re not beautiful. But you have an interesting expression in your eyes and an intriguing freshness. I want to be near you.”

Alice drew back farther, nearly dancing at arms length from him. “I don’t know how I feel about that.”

He pulled her closer. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to offend you, but you asked for honesty, and I could see you wanted it.”

“I did want it. But the reasons you like me are not the ones I was looking for.”

“What do you mean?”

“Oh, never mind. It doesn’t matter.” She didn’t tell him that he’d have to live with her personality and her opinions and her beliefs for the rest of his life if they married. He could figure that out himself if he had any brain worthwhile in his head.

“If there’s anything on your mind, I’d like to know about it. We need to practice communication. I know. My mother’s already started lecturing me on the subject,” he said teasingly.

Alice scowled. She wasn’t ready for this. She thought she’d been ready for this – more than ready – but she wasn’t. Why must he rush things? They’d barely just met; she barely knew him. Yet she knew him longer than she knew Peter – Mr. Strauss – and she felt as if she knew him very well. Perhaps it was because she’d discussed religion with him, and that was what was at her soul. Perhaps if she brought it up with Gibson …

“Mr. Ashfield, I’ve enjoyed seeing you at church these last several weeks … did you hear anything interesting in the sermon last week?”

Gibson laughed merrily. “Nobody listens to that old man talk,” he laughed.

Alice frowned. “I do.”

“Of course you do, my sweet little Puritan maid.”

“Trust me, I’m not a ‘sweet little Puritan maid,’ least of all yours. But, Mr. Ashfield, haven’t you any relationship with God? It’s so important.”

“I believe He exists. And … let me see? How does the verse go? The one about believing that everyone quotes?”

“John 3:16?”

“Maybe. You can probably recite it for me.”

“‘For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.’”

“That’s it. And I do believe He exists, so that makes me a Christian.”

“I don’t think that’s what it means, exactly.”

“Of course it is. What else could it mean?”

Alice, whose head had begun to ache, decided not to reply just then. There will be plenty of time to talk to him about these things after you’re married, she assured herself. Just concentrate on the marriage now; later he will change. You’ll make him change. You’ll show him the truth. God will understand.

“Perhaps it does,” said Alice.


Constructive criticism is welcome … nay, expected! (Just kidding … but, seriously, comment!)

Quote-of-the-Update

“The truth is too good for him!” ~Alice Knight, At Her Fingertips

Thanks for reading,
~Kellyn Roth

What do you think of my thoughts?

41 Responses

  1. NO NO NO! Alice can’t think that about Gibson. Never! Oh, sorry, that’s not really criticism… just frustrated-reader-syndrome… 😛
    CutePolarBear

  2. I hope she doesn’t marry him….what does Alice look like? I saw you wrote about her not being beautiful, but I can’t remember what she looks like. 🙂

    1. “I am tall and skinny. Mother says ‘slim,’ but ‘slim’ doesn’t allow for the lack of curves. I have none. Maybe that’s changed by/during your lifetime, but if I’m going to fill out in certain areas, then it should’ve happened by now … at least, I think so. I have black hair and eyes. My complexion is rosy, and I do hope that’ll never change, because it’s the most beautiful part of me. I’m plain. Not ugly, but just bland. I haven’t an exotic, angelic, or different piece of skin on my body. I’m not being modest; I’m being honest. I don’t mind the way I look. Besides, I don’t want to be judged by my looks, and my appearance assures that I never will be. People often have grudges against the beautiful or the ugly, but the plain get by, and their personalities shine. It shall be so with me.” -Alice Knight, At Her Fingertips (Chapter One)

  3. Ooh, good job! 😀 I’ve been totally absent from wordpress for a long time…aside from reading other people’s posts once in a while, of course. (I think I’ve read most of yours.) Anyway, YAY FOR WINNING! That’s awesome. I would really like to win, but I’m not even at 25K yet, for a multitude of reasons (the biggest of which being procrastinating). But I think I figured out what my story is about, and I learned how to love it, which is the most important part, right? Anyway, I’m really impressed by how steadily you’ve been writing. Good for you!
    Also, I love the excerpt! “Little Puritan maid…” What a great line. 🙂 And I’m excited about Peter! I think you did the romance well, from what I’ve read. But no Kirk…? Sad day…I can’t help but love romances with childhood friends. Peter sounds really cool, though. I want to read it! (Of course, I may be getting a bit ahead of myself…I should probably read Ivy Introspective first of all…)
    So…I’m curious, what’s wrong with Alice so that she’s not beautiful? Did something happen to her? *is very curious*
    Okay, I know you asked for constructive criticism, and I’m trying to find some things to, well, criticize, but seriously, how do you write this well in your first draft during NaNoWriMo? I mean, the only thing I can think of is that it may be a little bit jumpy…what’s the right word? Interrupted? Choppy, that’s the word. Alice’s thought process might be a little bit choppy with the conversation at times, but honestly, well done! You did great, and now I really want to read it!

    1. Well, I edit excerpts some before I post them. *sheepish grin* Otherwise, I don’t think I’d be able to post them … they can be … interesting … at times. XD
      Alice is plain/bland and too no-nonsense to either say she’s pretty or complain about her looks. I posted an quote in which she explains her opinions of herself in a comment somewhere around here … *glances up and down comment section* She’s really just ordinarily pretty – not special, but still pretty-ish – when you hear about her from someone else’s perspective (unless that someone else is Gibson the Abhorrible … and yes, that’s a word …).
      Thank you! I can’t believe I’ve written as much as I have … but it’s come easily this NaNo. I haven’t gotten a serious case of writer’s block yet. It’s really weird. I think the sky is falling … 😛
      Yep, that’s the most important part, definitely. I think is NaNo got you there, it’s definitely worth it even if you don’t win. Besides, winning NaNo is subjective at best. 😉
      Kirk is present. Just … well … you’ll have to wait to read the book, I guess. XD

      1. Hehe, I get that. Most of my first draft writing is always…interesting, we’ll just go with that. 😉
        Ahh, okay. So she’s okay. I was worried she’d gotten horribly scarred or burned or something and that was a little frightening.
        Haha, Gibson the Abhorrible. *will forever think of him that way from now on*
        Yeah, NaNo has been good, and best of all, I want to work on my novel now, even after NaNo is over, so that’s really awesome!
        So…when do I get to read it? 😉

        1. I … don’t know? I seriously need to get to work on Ivy Introspective. I mean, I’ve been neglecting it horribly. For over a year now. *sighs* I’m afraid I don’t love it quite as much as At Her Fingertips. 😉
          No, she’s not horribly scarred. Although … *scratches down ideas* What? I must write down every evil thought that occurs … although that evil thought wasn’t aimed at Alice …
          That’s great! Hopefully you’ll be able to keep it up after NaNo … I know I won’t be able to. My greatest fear is not actually finishing At Her Fingertips before the month is up and losing my momentum. :O

          1. Yes, work on Ivy Introspective! And if you don’t love it as much, then maybe you can find a way to love it as much as At Her Fingertips…hmmm.
            Hehe, well, in one of my novel ideas that I started and never finished, the main character is horribly scarred, so perhaps that’s where that thought came from.
            I…haven’t been working on it after November so far (mainly because I’m thinking about a different novel…bad Lana) but I do want to still finish it and I think once I get started working on it then I’ll be able to work on it some more.

            1. I’m actually getting along nicely with the revising! For once, it seems to be coming together. Of course, I’m only 33 pages in, so maybe the plot holes are down the road …

                    1. Yep … I can literally think of a thousand things that need to be included in IvIn. And I keep finding more. One of my alpha readers just emailed me about a MAJOR plot hole … *sigh*

                    2. -wants to see the list of a thousand things…hehe, just kidding- Aww…but at least you found out where the plot hole was and now you can fix it! *offers virtual cookies and hugs*

                    3. -was greatly exaggerating- -blinks- But I kinda want to list at least a couple of them in a blog post now … huh. Yeah, I hope so … *accepts virtual cookies and hugs*

  4. Please don’t make Alice marry Gibson . . . *reader sobbing* ‘Palice’ must happen! ‘Palice’ must happen! *protesters outside window*
    . . . And yes, ‘Palice’ is the best ship name that I can come up with. 😉

  5. How do you write like tomorrow won’t arrive? How do you write like you need it to survive? How do you write ev’ry second you’re alive? Every second you’re alive? Every second you’re alive? 😉
    (*randomly jumps on table* HAMILTON WROTE THE OTHER FIFTY-ONE! *coughs* *whistles nonchalantly* *saunters away casually*)
    EY! In all seriousness, congrats though, Kell! I’m proud of you! *wipes away tear* My little baby’s all grown up and saving China. 😉 XD

      1. Pfft. America does need some saving though, so you better get on that. ;P
        HA! IS THAT A CHALLENGE!? DUDE YOU TOTALLY HAVE TO LISTEN TO IT THOUGH! XD I’ve been listening to it nonstop. *laughs manically* *throws some more Hamilton references around* *dances around randomly, singing* I just may be a … *coughs* little bit obsessed if you can’t tell. XD

  6. YESSSSS AND ALSO NOOO!!! *screams* Like… ohm…. I CAN’T START.
    I LOVE THE NEW THEME CHANGE, it is sooo pretty. I am inspired… ;D Maybe I’ll shake things up for the season… *tsk tsk*
    Awesome work, Kellyn! I am so excited for this book!

  7. *screams* Oh my gosh, that’s brilliant! AND YOU HAVE 50K+ WORDS OF THAT!? You never cease to amaze me. (If you have no idea who this is, btw, it’s AugusttheAwesome from the old NaNo site, who has not yet turned 13 and must simply eavesdrop on other’s conversations in the forums.)

      1. Yes! I can’t wait until you publish it! (No rush, though. I have not yet edited anything, not even lasts year’s nano project, so you’re way ahead of me.

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